Yesterday, I was in a total funk.  I had perspective lingering on my self-willing mind, but I felt very blah.  I of course was not thrilled about my two pound meal from Sunday, but it went beyond that.  Yesterday was my “walking” day.  I alternate running and walking days.  As I was on the smallest walk ever, I was not well.  I kept having a stabbing pain in my back/hip area, telling me that maybe my body is not recovering from the over-usage injury from last year I incurred.  I mulled around the house all day envisioning myself staying in bed the following morning instead of running.  I had a slight headache.  It was just an over-all BLAH feeling while I was trying to maintain perspective.

So last night, I told my husband how I felt and how I didn’t want to run in the morning.  He told me- “that is exactly why you need to get right out of bed in the morning and run.  Don’t even think about it.”  It seemed like good advice…like Nike says- “Just Do It.”  So I decided to listen and thank goodness I did.  I had a great run!  I felt great and strong throughout the 2.3 jaunt.  I had wished I went on a longer run when I was done.  No pain, no negative feelings…just the usual greatness feeling that I get after running.

It is well known that our minds trick us when it comes to food or exercise and I feel like that is what was happening yesterday.  My body got excited about the Sunday food fest and urged me to keep going in that direction because that is what it is wired to do.  Store fat and keep it!  I was definitely feeling chemically reinforced for food and laziness.  Even that pain I had while walking yesterday, seems completely phantom today.  I even spent some time doing calisthenics on that area after my run today and it all felt great!  What’s more is the fact that I already lost one of those two pounds I had gained.  With the mind set I have today, I would not be surprised if I lost my other pound today and can re-embrace my 140 pounds stat tomorrow. 

So yes!  Even when you feel BLAH or your body is telling you to give up, do not listen!  Yes, listening to your body is a good practice, but just like parenting your child, sometimes we have to know and do what is best for us even when it is hard to do.

Well Sunday was an exciting day in our household.  We enjoyed watching our favorite NFL team (the Seattle Seahawks) win, and had good company and food to help us enjoy the afternoon and game.  What a great day!
On the flip side, I kind of got excited about the food.  As my kids would say...I was starving!  Although everyone within an eye shot can easily tell you I am nowhere near that.  I also like to point out to my children that people in this world actually face hunger and it is a serious issue!  Imagine all the people in this world that do not get an oppertunity for enough food on a daily basis.  Now imagine all the people that have and consume too much.  The food situation in this world seems slightly insane from a bird's eye perspective.  Couldn't we take food away from obese people and give it to people who are actually starving and do everyone a favor?!
Now that I have solved world hunger, I will go back to my personal issues.  Portion control gets me almost every time!  I almost always eat foods that are widely accepted as "healthy".  Sunday afternoon I threw portion or sensibility to the side and so I gained two pounds.  I have done this many many times, throughout this process this year.  I just have to do the work.  Be consistant with smaller portions, and no late evening eating.
So here is my take home message from this weekend: you can enjoy a Sunday afternoon football game without the weight gain!  Enjoy your game.  Enjoy good food.  Don't forget who is actually starving in this world.  If that does not include you- count your blessings and do not over indulge!

Today is a good day!  I am happy to announce that my BMI is down to 25.6.  I am down to 140 pounds and this inspires me so much because the next stop is in the “130’s”.  A healthy BMI for my height can be obtained at 136 pounds.  That is only four pounds away!  This is quite thrilling, I cannot quite articulate it, but let me try.

  I have not weighed in the 130’s since I was sixteen and I had some major self-image issues which culminated into a phase of anorexic tenancies.  I starved myself- I abused my body and sadly swallowed diet pills by the handfuls.  I did not respect my body or health at all.  It is really sad, but the truth is my story can be echoed by most women who were once teenagers. 

This is the first time, I have nourished my body and maintained happiness throughout weight loss.  What else should there be?!  I deserve to be healthy and happy.  I deserve to not sabotage myself and then be disappointed with my actions.  Am I going to do that though ever again??? YES…absolutely!  I can guarantee I am going to eat something and then be either disappointed with my portion or timing because it was not the healthy choice. 

The key to my success has been consistency!  I have been to birthday parties and of course had cake.  I  went camping and indulged for a week!  Overall, though I continue to eat the right foods, watch my portions, and exercise.  I walk to the dinner table with a ½ cup measuring cup for my rice because rice can almost always get me every time.   I am getting better about just dishing up a sensible portion without the measuring cup, which is ideal.  I don’t need to get too technical- that is not healthy either. 

On another note, this morning my husband and I were talking and he told me his weight.  My guy is big.  Think offensive lineman through college big.  It gives me peace to know my man outweighs me by a significant amount J.  The point is, this morning he told me what his weight is and I have weighed more than that…years ago…more than a decade ago before my husband and I met.  I weighed 217 pounds.  I went through a really hard time in my life and what can I say?  I was in survival mode.  I remember the pride I received when I got below 200.  It was a thrill to me; like getting my life back after being out of control.

Even though being in survival mode, having real life situational stressors, not taking care of myself, all seems like a life time ago, I value this reflection of mine.  I can see this journey with my weight has been quite a ride and basically an overall status of health and happiness in every facet of my life.  I find it is no coincidence that I am at a peak of spiritual, physical, and mental health in my adult life.  Our bodies and minds are interconnected and each of us should be striving to do our best in each department in order to obtain our best possible overall health condition.  I hope each of you find encouragement, inspiration, or at least enjoy reading about my journey, as I’m sure many can relate to.  Best of health to each of you!